Although I still gag at the mere glimpse of Lifetime movies and their unapologetically sustained profusion of “love” stories – the predictable pyramid plot structure whose conflict is always resolved by a wedding – I am finding myself feeling incredibly lucky these days. This is not only because I have taken life by the horns and have begun a streak of no-better-time-than-now living, it is also a result of one of three last-stabs-in-the-dark as my Match membership was approaching expiration at the end of last November.
While the two of those three stabs would make for really good Sex and the Pity material, I’ll give you the abridged version.
Stab #1: After two dates, Stab #1 made a lot of assumptions about what lack of communication over the course of ~ 22 hours meant and then flipped out via text thus setting off my Cling-dar ® among other ‘dars.
Stab #2: I had a phone conversation with Stab #2 once during which I jokingly told him that if he got really drunk at the bar he was going to the following evening, he would only be a block away from one of the less classy strip joints in town. He got overly excited and proceeded to talk about strip clubs for the rest of the conversation.
Stab #3: Stab #3 and I have just passed the two month mark and are well on the way to (hopefully) passing up my three month threshold (which has not happened with anyone in quite some time). He is incredible. More accurately, we are incredible together. In ways that I have yet to fully comprehend, he satiates me. We are a nuclear fusion, a collision of skepticism turned to unabashed mutual adoration, and I fully plan to keep him for as long as he will allow me to do so.
I am running rather short on Sex and the Pity material, as Mr. Wonderful does not appear to be an asshole, douchebag, or hot mess enough to provide me with new blogging material. (I am quite okay with this.)
Since I am finally winning at this ridiculous game, I would love to hear about and share your Hot Messes and/or Dating Travesties.
You may send me submissions of fully written blog entries (though, I reserve the right to edit them) or you may send me particularly hot and messy profile shots from the various dating websites out there.
Please submit your work to firstname.lastname@example.org Include your full name, contact info, and how you want your name to appear should it be published.